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Guys have to remember to be masculine somewhat dominant, assumptive, bold, challenging.

As above, a lot of these behaviour lists from ladies seem to me to be more like a list of what a man needs to do once he has secured a ladies interest in him. Many guys seem to focus on being nice and forget to be sexual.

Many guys seem to focus on being nice and forget to be sexual.

Really? Many? Where are they? Only in the UK?
Never met one. It's often the opposite here.
Focus on being sexual and forget to be nice.

Not that I want them to forget to be sexual ... down the road a bit.
Affection, sooner than that is where I am at. It's great dating foreplay
after a date or two and there is no second date, with me, unless
I can tell they are someone I would "do" given knowing them better
through romantic friendship.

What I wish guys would do, that I have met, that hasnt happened in ages
is forget to pressure ME to be sexual. Now that's romantic!
And makes me into them all the more.

Just doesnt seem to happen much in North America.
But, many Europeans I have met have that down.
They are secure and know they don't have to "pressure" anyone
with premature expectations. THAT is very sexy to me!

Really? Many? Where are they? Only in the UK?
Never met one. It's often the opposite here.
Focus on being sexual and forget to be nice.

Not that I want them to forget to be sexual ... down the road a bit.
Affection, sooner than that is where I am at. It's great dating foreplay
after a date or two and there is no second date, with me, unless
I can tell they are someone I would "do" given knowing them better
through romantic friendship.

What I wish guys would do, that I have met, that hasnt happened in ages
is forget to pressure ME to be sexual. Now that's romantic!
And makes me into them all the more.

Just doesnt seem to happen much in North America.
But, many Europeans I have met have that down.
They are secure and know they don't have to "pressure" anyone
with premature expectations. THAT is very sexy to me!

I don't know enough about you to comment with any great insight into your own situation.

All I can say you are completely incorrect in saying you have never met one guy that needs to be more sexual than he believes he needs to be polite etc to win a woman's heart.

These are the guys that don't approach women. They are everywhere. Around every dance floor at a club too shy to talk to a woman for fear of rejection etc.


Now a lot of these guys may well be ineffective romancing a woman but thats a different issue. i think as a lot of experienced men will tell you. the men that appear "secure" and know they don't need to pressure you are often seemingly secure because.

- they are inept - they risk loosing women to more aggressive males - they can't know how you will respond so they are taking a gamble
- they have plenty of other choices and options and don't care if they loose you
- they may be having a more sexual time with other women and therefore playing a long game with you
- they are simply culturally different because the women in their country play by different rules so are seemingly harder to get. They are still playing a game it is naive to think because the game is romance it is an more sincere.

They could also be real nice guys but of course so could the guy thats trying to get you into bed. He is just playing a different strategy.



If you like being romanced in a particular way, I would suggest approaching more men directly. A naturally romantic guy will be romantic. Being romantic and confidant/experienced chatting up women are not the same thing.

You probably know, but as a guy I can tell you there are a lot of ladies out there that beat a guy up for trying to be romantic, they can see it as cheesy or in sincere when it is not, possibly because they have fallen for a romantic player and haven't learnt to differentiate. Just shut the door and gone on to no doubt make mistakes elsewhere with guys that have a different approach.

Page Turner wrote:
What I wish guys would do, that I have met, that hasnt happened in ages
is forget to pressure ME to be sexual. Now that's romantic!
And makes me into them all the more.

Any guy who's pressuring you, is desperate.

But, many Europeans I have met have that down.
They are secure and know they don't have to "pressure" anyone
with premature expectations. THAT is very sexy to me!

And if a woman is going to play the sex 'moratorium' game with him, then she's toying with him, to see how dominant she can be over him.
Or holds herself in higher esteem than him, and hopes he will agree that her worth is more than his.

And probably added to that, the presumption that the man is/would be celibate, without her.

Classic 'kick to the curb' material.

Any woman who believes she is the 'seller' in a 'sellers' market, is delusional, and any man who buys into her delusion, is a loser who can do no better.

Any woman that requires provocation, or persuasion into being sexual with a man (she ostensibly wants to have a healthy sexual relationship with), has got issues, that are best to be forgotten as quickly as her.

They're probably completely ignorant to the fact of how counterproductive they are in relation to women who get what they most want, and how they virtually pave their way into attrition and loneliness.

Classic.

Men and women are equals in dating and relationships.

Any man who would toy with a woman as a potential lover, in the same way a great number of women do with men, would be looked upon as a complete idiot, by BOTH genders.

Ergo...

verityone wrote:

Page Turner wrote:
What I wish guys would do, that I have met, that hasnt happened in ages
is forget to pressure ME to be sexual. Now that's romantic!
And makes me into them all the more.

Any guy who's pressuring you, is desperate.

But, many Europeans I have met have that down.
They are secure and know they don't have to "pressure" anyone
with premature expectations. THAT is very sexy to me!

And if a woman is going to play the sex 'moratorium' game with him, then she's toying with him, to see how dominant she can be over him.
Or holds herself in higher esteem than him, and hopes he will agree that her worth is more than his.

And probably added to that, the presumption that the man is/would be celibate, without her.

Classic 'kick to the curb' material.

Any woman who believes she is the 'seller' in a 'sellers' market, is delusional, and any man who buys into her delusion, is a loser who can do no better.

Any woman that requires provocation, or persuasion into being sexual with a man (she ostensibly wants to have a healthy sexual relationship with), has got issues, that are best to be forgotten as quickly as her.

They're probably completely ignorant to the fact of how counterproductive they are in relation to women who get what they most want, and how they virtually pave their way into attrition and loneliness.

Classic.

Men and women are equals in dating and relationships.

Any man who would toy with a woman as a potential lover, in the same way a great number of women do with men, would be looked upon as a complete idiot, by BOTH genders.

Ergo...

I wholeheartedly agree!

verityone wrote:Any woman who believes she is the 'seller' in a 'sellers' market, is delusional,......

This is the part I wish more women would get a clue about. Yet, the more attractive she is the more convienced she is that this is an 'absolute' in life. Granted, the more physically attractive she is....the more options she has in men. BUT, a man that is a keeper will also look for the intangibles - most generally: attitude - to decide if he wants to keep her. The attitude quoted will not cut it with a mature man. Period!

verityone wrote:.....and any man who buys into her delusion, is a loser who can do no better.

Yep. OR, he might be the type to prey upon her delusion which would make him a user, AND a loser!

MOST women need to learn to make the distinction between a worthy and an unworthy man. The dancing monkey willing to jump through a woman's hoops IS a "loser," because he's desperate or a 'player.' Either way, a woman will have NO respect for him in the long run.

Men have their own set of circumstances to deal with along these lines.

Thus is life!

just a few thoughts

^^^ Excuse me but there are women on the planet that feel the same way about it as you guys do.
The problem with that is we get labeled with all kinds of different tags.
The difference is I still get the fact that this is a mans world.
Im am not a dime a dozen chick though nor will I let any man treat me like one.
Even if its for a roll in the hay.

xlr8ingmargo wrote:^^^ Excuse me but there are women on the planet that feel the same way about it as you guys do.

Well, Excuuuuuuuzze Me! (just playing)

But, I did use qualifiers such as "more" and "most."

I know there are exceptions or I would give up all togather.

just an 'added' thought

I think this thread nicely sums up that everyone has gripes about the opposite due to their particular experiences. Some men are twats, some women are twats. Personally I think the balance is fairly equal and that none of us are perfect.

swan wrote:I think this thread nicely sums up that everyone has gripes about the opposite due to their particular experiences. Some men are twats, some women are twats. Personally I think the balance is fairly equal and that none of us are perfect.

WEll as you know, i am anything but a tw@t... I would say fairly atttractive, tall, with a full head of wavy golden locks of hair when I grow it (but I get it cut like this out of choice) very articulate and polite, and always conduct myself with charm and wit...




Walks off the stage Dixie....