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No insults or slanderous libel. Be nice to each other. We reserve the right to edit abusive insults out of your posts. Do not post any content about another user that could be considered untrue, slanderous libel or defamation of character.

It would seem that providing proof of accusations made is in order. Note what rule #2 states.

My my my, this certainly turned into a mess. To call someone a liar is absolutely disgusting. I have no idea what you thought the outcome would be, but I can tell you what you did accomplish. You have now turned her into a victim & yourself into a big bad bully! You have lost all of your credibility. Personally I think you need to go to your room until you learn how to behave around adults.

What's the saying.."if you can't say something nice, then don't say anything at all". But we say it differently here in the deep South, "keep it up & u gonna git yo phuckin azz whipt boy."

To my recollection, savona has never mentioned paying alimony/support payments. She's always been a strong avocate for the rigors of being a stay at home mom.
I have paid spousal support, so perhaps you're mixing us up?

It would seem that providing proof of accusations made is in order. Note what rule #2 states.

I just tried finding it on POF. It doesn't help when the post in question was made sometime in the Fall of 2009.

POF's search is very bad.
Member's post history only goes back so far and not far enough in this case.

It's like trying to find a needle in a haystack.

It doesn't help when *Cowboy* deletes threads left, right and centre either. And that was usually the case for the particular thread I'm speaking of.

My my my, this certainly turned into a mess. To call someone a liar is absolutely disgusting. I have no idea what you thought the outcome would be, but I can tell you what you did accomplish. You have now turned her into a victim & yourself into a big bad bully! You have lost all of your credibility. Personally I think you need to go to your room until you learn how to behave around adults.

Isn't that one of the reasons that people lie around here? To be the victim?

Didn't she make herself the victim by telling us the story?

I simply pointed out that her story doesn't tie in with a previous one. How does stating facts lose one's credibility?

Who's the one here having a temper tandrum and needs to go to her room?

To my recollection, savona has never mentioned paying alimony/support payments. She's always been a strong avocate for the rigors of being a stay at home mom. I have paid spousal support, so perhaps you're mixing us up?

No, I remember it very clearly. I had many debates with Savona and Daisy on POF and I remember her saying this.

No she did not make herself a victim, you did. She opened up & was vulnerable to people whom she thought she could trust. I really doubt she wanted our pity, she is way too grown up & logical for that. However, even if she is a liar, who gave you the right to say so? Have you designated yourself the liar police? The forums are for discussion, not for outing people & putting them in a defenseless situation. If she did indeed lie so what! Are you going to say you have absolutely never stretched the truth.

Bottom line is it doesn't even matter, what she said made for good discussion.

No one has the right to personally attack anyone. The only reason a person resorts to that type of tactic is to intentionally cause a rucus.

First I would like to apologize for getting so upset. And for posting as I did.

I feel allot of frustration for single parents who try to start a new life, who pull themselves out of that nasty hole that can seem so deep and dark. I only came on here to give comforting words and perhaps help to a fellow poster who seemed to me was struggling.

I did not expect to get so fired up when she was accused of fabricating her story. As I said I do NOT believe that most people come on here to tell their story and go about fabricating it.

Next I tried to show that although things are set in the way of support, when I discovered that this poster had like me gotten divorced decades ago that support was very very different then.

I perhaps could ask for these posts to be deleted, but truthfully I would like them to stay. It is a good lesson for people to see different sides of things. It is a good view of what some people think of single parents, and the minimization of the difficulties of single parents.

Not only to be raising children often without support of a partner, but the belittling view of people who just don't get it makes single parenthood all that much more difficult.

Sometimes it is easy to target single parents for much of the problems with dating, and so it is no doubt why people that are both single parents can find comfort with others who are in the same situation. Being a single parent and juggling kids, dating, working is the biggest balancing act ever. I guess it was because of this that I bowed out of being in a relationship for much of the past 10 years, even though my kids have been mostly grown for much of it.

I admire people who can manage to date and end up in an amazing relationship with kids in tow. I did that long ago, and looking back don't know how the hell I did it. I don't feel that single parents were so victimized as much then as they are now.

Accusations that they only want a partner to raise their kids, or to go after support, money or what ever, all the crap that I have read in the forums towards single parents makes me feel sick. I feel that people who feel this way about single parents should just stay the hell away from them, and allow those who come here for dating advice NOT shiit on them, or accuse them of being BS'ers

This is not a debate thread ... it is for support and for people to share their experiences and advice ... Anyway on to the Bar open thread I need a drink

Oppps just about to post and saw this

Didn't she make herself the victim by telling us the story?

How does telling my story about support make me a victim? I don't feel like one, not ever did ... yet you feel the right to call me one for sharing what happened to me 20 years ago.

I simply pointed out that her story doesn't tie in with a previous one. How does stating facts lose one's credibility?

Because you were told that you were wrong, and you called me a BS'er meaning I am a liar. AND you are doing it again

Who's the one here having a temper tandrum and needs to go to her room?

Yep it did give me a temper tantrum as you just told two women in a row, in a parenting thread that we are both fabricating our stories.

Its Margo wrote: To my recollection, savona has never mentioned paying alimony/support payments. She's always been a strong avocate for the rigors of being a stay at home mom. I have paid spousal support, so perhaps you're mixing us up?

No, I remember it very clearly. I had many debates with Savona and Daisy on POF and I remember her saying this.

[/quote]

Here you go, doing it again ...

Time out for you little bucko ...



^^^ And there you go again ... pizz off

dotcom wrote:No she did not make herself a victim, you did.

Savona wrote:How does telling my story about support make me a victim? I don't feel like one, not ever did ... yet you feel the right to call me one for sharing what happened to me 20 years ago.

I disagree. Anyone who talks about how the bully "provider" got away scot free is either directly or indirectly making themselves a victim.

I need a "right" to have an opinion?

The following statement isn't victimization?...

Savona wrote:I feel allot of frustration for single parents who try to start a new life, who pull themselves out of that nasty hole that can seem so deep and dark. I only came on here to give comforting words and perhaps help to a fellow poster who seemed to me was struggling.

dotcom wrote:However, even if she is a liar, who gave you the right to say so? Have you designated yourself the liar police?

I need a "right" to call someone on a lie? You need to be the liar police for that? It doesn't matter if it's in the fora or real life, if I hear someone say something that doesn't tie into a previous statement, then I will point that out.

If that person chooses to have a temper tamdrum, then so be it.

What is it with you two and "rights"?

If she did indeed lie so what! Are you going to say you have absolutely never stretched the truth.

Bottom line is it doesn't even matter, what she said made for good discussion.

Pointing out her inconsistency was applicable to her post that was addressed to me.

How is what she said the makings of good discussion?

Savona wrote:Because you were told that you were wrong, and you called me a BS'er meaning I am a liar. AND you are doing it again

This doesn't provide justifaction for the statement.

Savona wrote:I perhaps could ask for these posts to be deleted, but truthfully I would like them to stay. It is a good lesson for people to see different sides of things. It is a good view of what some people think of single parents, and the minimization of the difficulties of single parents.

Once again, either a direct or indirect attempt to victimize.

Savona wrote:I perhaps could ask for these posts to be deleted, but truthfully I would like them to stay. It is a good lesson for people to see different sides of things. It is a good view of what some people think of single parents, and the minimization of the difficulties of single parents.

Not only to be raising children often without support of a partner, but the belittling view of people who just don't get it makes single parenthood all that much more difficult.

What a pile of bullcrap. My posts here are not my view on single parents. I have not made one comment about my view on single parents. I've simply pointed out that some statements here don't add up.

Savona wrote:Accusations that they only want a partner to raise their kids, or to go after support, money or what ever, all the crap that I have read in the forums towards single parents makes me feel sick. I feel that people who feel this way about single parents should just stay the hell away from them, and allow those who come here for dating advice NOT shiit on them, or accuse them of being BS'ers

If you read my first post in this thread, you'll notice I said that most single parents are not looking for a partner to support the kids.

Not only are you playing the victim card, but now you're writing incorrect info in an attempt to make me the bully.

Not only are you playing the victim card, but now you're writing incorrect info in an attempt to make me the bully.

You mean victim ???

Give it a rest Teen, we are not here to be picked on, we are here to discuss. Someday you will learn that being bluntly honest is a fools way. Pointing out what you perceive as wrong is ludicrous. So what if you thought she lied, so what if you thought she was playing the victim. Sometimes it just isn't important & I think you did it on purpose just to cause an argument. Geez some people will do anything for attention, good or bad doesn't matter to them. So give it a rest, you had your 2 seconds of attention.

Anyone who talks about how the bully "provider" got away scot free is either directly or indirectly making themselves a victim.

How so? Pointing out that some absentee parents shirk their responsibilities, and that some of the systems for dealing with child support are inadequate is not declaring oneself a victim, its just stating facts.

I've had not so much as a pair of socks for my kids from the womb donor in almost 4 years, but I'm not a victim, quite the opposite in fact, she keeps her money and has to deal with her conscience, I keep the kids...sounds like a top deal to me!

If there are any victims after a family split, its the chldren who have to get their heads around the loss of a parent.